Tuesday 31 January 2012

Without Him.

Posted by Unknown at 23:15:00 0 comments
I've recently joined a gym, I decided that I can no longer get away with the"I've just given birth" excuse and something must be done.The only thing wrong with this is I can't take him with me, obvious but nevertheless unfortunate, thus meaning he spends my gym sessions at grandmas house. 

We are only apart for a couple of hours maximum, but trying to explain how much I miss him is hard, harder than hard. To say its like missing a limb may sound excessive but I do truly feel lost without him, and even though I know he's safe, happy and loved and I trust my mum completely the feeling of knowing he's not with me can leave me feeling like I've lost my purpose. It's difficult coming to grips with the fact that someone other than me can look after him, give him what he needs and make him happy.

I suppose what I'm trying to say is i miss him, even when people tell you that the love you feel for your baby is indescribable, I still can't believe how attached I have become in such a short space of time and how, I personally, have fallen so hard, fast and completely in love with with my little boy... I guess I've just gotten used to him being around that's all.

Monday 30 January 2012

From the Start.

Posted by Unknown at 21:54:00 0 comments


Wow, where to start... four months old already, MY little boy. It’s gone so quick! Meaning to start writing it straight after his birth I’ve only just caught my breath and he’s already started on solid food. Having a baby, not just any baby, having Connor is quite honestly the most amazing thing I have ever done, and I’m sure every mother says the same about their baby, but knowing that doesn’t make it any less true for me.

That’s not to say he doesn’t come without his challenges and as much as I convinced myself I was wholly and completely ready for him, nothing prepared me for how much he turned my life upside down, in a good way of course.  As much as he may scream sometimes, all the poo, sick and unexpected wees during a nappy change are all forgotten when I get that first smile of the day, letting me know just for that minute I’m doing alright.

Anyway more about the boy, born seven pounds and eight ounces with a great mop of dark hair and big blue eyes he was alert and completely perfect. He arrived right when they said he would, on his due date, October ninth 2011. Now four months on, eyes still blue, hair getting fairer and coming in at twelve pounds twelve ounces, his progression and strength often overwhelms me. Every day it seems he’s taught himself something new, he’s been holding his head up for some time now and can easily hold his own weight and watching him lying on his front rolling himself over and over he is showing huge promise of some welcomed movement sometime soon. And if there’s one thing I’ve learnt about this little man, my little man, he knows what he wants and, as clichéd as it sounds, I’m the proudest mummy in the world watching him go for it. 
 

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